Today was ridiculous man, and not all that much happened.
So as most have you have already read on my Twitter and/or Facebook, some Asian hacker fucked with my Windows Live ID account and bought 10,000 MS points on Xbox Live (roughly $125). When this news was getting to me, I was in the middle of Scriptwriting class, and was unaware that this ASSHOLE had done this.
About halfway through the class, I got a 10 minute break and checked my email. I was not only shocked, but I was appalled that someone would just do something like that. So I had to get on the phone and dial my bank to tell them they were fraudulent charges and get it fixed.
The young woman on the other end of the line was very nice and helpful, but told me that she would have to cancel my card and send me a new one to get it entirely fixed. FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! I thought to myself. I don’t usually carry cash on me, so that meant I had to wait a week for food if I didn’t get some kind of temporary card.
I was boiling in class like a stew over a low fire. As the minutes wore on, I was getting more agitated, to almost the point of exploding from rage, fear, and anger. I kept my cool (as always), and managed to make it through with time to spare.
I went to the bank and got it all fixed and made SURE I pulled out enough cash to keep me afloat in case some more shit happened to me.
Anyway, why I was targeted and not someone else, I cannot say. My internet presence has grown more and more the past few months, and I fear that may have caused some issues, but I doubt it.
Lucky for the hacker, I actually learned something from this experience: Always carry some cash on you.
I know I won’t get fooled again, just like Roger Daltrey said.
I am pondering today. I am pondering about how I feel, about who I am, and about what I want. I tend to talk about all of these things constantly, but I never ask myself WHY I am the way I am.
I think inherently, most people do not try to look deeper than what’s on the surface because either they don’t care, or they don’t want to know. It’s easier to know someone by looking at them than talking to them, but if you make the effort to try, you just might be surprised.
I believe I am a perfect example of this philosophy. To my friends who know me outside of twitter, they see a dude that’s a little stranger than most. To everyone on the internet, I’m like some kind of superhero, people give me praise, and they like what I do. But which one of these is the truth?
I talk about Duality a lot, that each person has the element to do a good or bad deed based on the situation they are in, and they usually have to make a choice. It could be as small as picking Coke or Pepsi, or going to the mall instead of the movies. The biggest of these would be something like a Sophie’s Choice, where you must choose who lives and who dies. Most of the time we are not given much of a choice, but when we are, we usually go for what seems to be most comfortable for us.
I am not like this. I would rather challenge myself and take the harder route than make things easy on myself. Sure, I don’t like when things go badly, but that doesn’t mean I want to half-ass anything either. I work well under pressure, I always have, and I always will.
Anyway, my point is that there is always something deeper within us as people that made us who we are now, and who we will be in the future. If you’re going through a crisis of faith, you will find your path if you try. If you are thinking of suicide, think of life instead and live for today. If you can’t find love, you must think positive and it will find you. Think of all you’ve been through up until this point in your life and you will find what you seek.
You need to remember that people are just as scared of you as you are of them, so approach them with open arms instead of with shut eyes and closed mouths. Love, understand, and educate.
Things are changing, my thoughts are changing, and people’s understanding of me is changing. I play hard, but I work harder. I have a constant gameface, and I’m always prepared at a moment’s notice. I am becoming more and more the man I hoped I would be one day.
That’s not to say I’ve peaked, but I’m just starting to hatch out of my cocoon. I’ll be a butterfly soon, and then nothing will stop me.
I don’t know what’s truly brought upon this great feeling of happiness as only a few weeks ago, I was in such an enormous rut. Now I feel like the world is at my fingertips.
This morning, I checked my grades for this past summer and was utterly shocked. I got 2 A-s and a B+ when I expected maybe 2 Bs and a C. Not only did I exceed my expectations, I surpassed them beyond what I had hoped. My Mom said it was because I’m where I need to be right now, and this was meant to be, but I am still shocked by this seemingly indelible set of circumstances.
My ego is not eased by this as I still have a long road ahead. As I wrote on Facebook, “I would pat myself on the back, but I’d rather just keep doing the best I can.”