This means War!
So my twitter account is becoming a very part of me, and it’s time to go to war… but not with someone else. No, it’s time to go to war with myself.
For the last year and a half, all I’ve done is wallow in pity of myself, trying to make sense of all the pain I’ve been through. I used to think I could handle it, but now that things are changing, I just want to let it all go.
But It’s so fucking hard.
I didn’t cause any of the damage dealt to me. I was forced into this situation by a man I call my father. It sucks more than a $20 hooker.
I act much older than I am. I don’t know why, but I don’t consider myself a kid by any means. People really don’t take me seriously. I really don’t think they should either. I’m crass, bold, think I know everything, but what am I worth? I haven’t proven anything to anyone other than myself.
I used to work as a game tester. I was 1 of 1500 that applied and 10 that got hired. I worked my ass off on that job, and my name is in the credits of TWO videogames. That’s nothing to be honest. Before that? I was an intern on a show called Kitchen Confidential. I was the youngest intern ever at 17. I felt good, but I made a fool of myself. I met a lot of cool people, and I got my first real taste of the industry. I know that my fortune lies in Entertainment, I just don’t know where yet.
I can act, sing, dance, write, but I still need to figure out which talent I should focus on. That’s the hard part. I want to do it all and more. I’m ambitious. I want to be a Creative Businessman.
So what’s next for me heading into the end of the year? Well, I have a few resolutions:
To live in the moment as much as possible. To let go of my fears, to find my path, to love, to lose, to win, to have moments of joy, and moments of pain. To handle myself with grace and understanding that is necessary. To not put so much pressure on myself. To accept who I am with all my might. To make new friends, or gain potential new enemies. To hold, to lust, to eat, to drink…
I really just hope I have a great 2011.
And so, life goes on, and we follow.